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Friday, 5 April 2013

Barbara Algie reflects on the speed of modern speech and TLAs**

Well hello again. How is life in the fast lane? Currently breaking the speed limit is the spoken word by the MM’s of this world (that’s Millenium Mumblers in case you haven’t been clever.)

Why is it that the teeniest toddler with lungs the size of table tennis balls manage to produce a volume of sound rivalling that of a Diva at La Scala yet, later, grow into a race of MM’s? Somebody (I’ve forgotten who it was now) once said a woman’s voice should be low and well-modulated.

Well go tell this to the infants of the world. The art of speaking slowly and clearly is a gift in grave danger of being lost. The English language deserves a better fate than it’s currently receiving from millions of MM’s. Appreciate, preserve and use it in a manner enjoyable to everyone. After all, if you’ve got something to say, do please make sure even the hardest of hearing amongst us are able to understand and applaud your story.

But to get back to speed. Have you noticed how words are being massacred by the AA’s of this world? (Not that sort – the Abbreviation Addicts.) Would you for instance understand me if I wrote ‘I hope you’ve all broken and chucked into the *WPB all those ridiculous *NYR’s you made whilst crawling into bed singing the last line of *ALS’? (Some, devised by texters and twitterers, aren’t quite that easy to decipher.) It was probably a cockney old-time music-haller who started the ball rolling with *TTFN and I must admit it sent a tingle of sentimental delight down the spine to receive an envelope with *SWALK on the back.

But does anybody really have time for letter writing? This not only deprives us of a long distance kiss but is causing the Post Office tremendous monetary problems. Maybe speed is today’s problem.

Slow down – take it easy - smell the roses on the way to wherever you’re going and speak up!

Oh well, until next time, TTFN.

LOL (oh dear, now I’m doing it!)

Big Al


(*Too Hard Basket/New Year Resolutions/Auld Lang Syne/Ta Ta for Now/Sealed with a Loving Kiss/and you all know the last one.)
** Three Letter Acronyms

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